Another Trip to Uncanny Valley

We stopped by the Olmsted County History Museum. It was underwhelming…until you turn the corner from the exhibit on the 1883 F5 tornado aftermath (which wasn’t what I would exactly describe as cheery). Then it was a horror show.

My five-year-old absolutely refused to enter the room below. I think he was upset because he saw a commercial for a new TV series: The Headless Horseman.

Sometimes a mannequin is better WITH A HEAD. OMG. :(
Sometimes a mannequin is better WITH A HEAD. OMG. 😦

But, before the headless military officers, there’s the surgery theater. My mother was particularly bothered by one of the mannequin doctors. “He’s looking right at you!” Yes, on top of the horrible scene, the Dr. Grimm gives you the stink eye. Sweet.

"Grumble, grumble, grumble."
“Grumble, grumble, grumble.”
"I frequently contemplate ways to murder Dr. Grimm."
“I frequently contemplate ways to murder Dr. Grimm.”

Here’s the surgery that the Clinic so nicely invites you to watch for learning/entertainment. So what I am saying is that my Sunday afternoon is booked, people. I’m busy breathing germs into a surgery theater.

Pretty sure the patient is awake during her eyeball removal surgery.
Pretty sure the patient is awake during her eyeball removal surgery.
The nurse says to the doctor, "How little ether to give to keep her slightly aware during this gruesome procedure?"
The nurse says to the doctor, “How little ether to give to keep her slightly aware during this gruesome procedure?”
"I think we killed her. Huh."
“I think we killed her. Huh.”

There’s also a spooky nurse watching over a child having some kind of conniption or demonic possession.

DSCN6509

Can't blame this mannequin from having a conniption. That icky doll is just awful.
Can’t blame this mannequin from having a conniption. That icky doll is just awful.
"Hush child. The monsters will eat your toes if you aren't quiet."
“Hush child. The monsters will eat your toes if you aren’t quiet.”
The word her hand covers up? Nightmare. Every Baby's NIGHTMARE.
The word her hand covers up? Nightmare. Every Baby’s NIGHTMARE.

(Please refrain from commenting on the Clinic and the wonderful work done there. I will just delete your comment. This is solely a commentary on the creepy museum. Because >_< WTH with the mannequins?)

Let me tell you a few things, Kiddo.

I see ya over there, lookin’ all innocent-like. I was like that once too. But then I started runnin’ with a rough crowd. That’s how I ended up behind bars. Don’t be like me. You’re a nice kid. Go home and kiss yer ma and tell ‘er ya love ‘er. And be good.

And if you do get yourself in a pile of poop, remember one thing. Don't let the time do you.

Animal Oddities

I went to Oxbow Park again in Rochester, MN. Sadly, the one-eyed owl was gone…probably to a better place. Disturbingly, it was replaced with an owl with a blind eye. What the hell is going on in Minnesota? Is there some assknocker out there poking at owls’ eyes so we have a sufficient supply of half-blinded owls?

You betcha!

I have to admit, I felt pretty silly after I finally read the information about the wonderful Great Horned Owl (who I would have named the Cat Head Owl on account of the cat ears and eyes). Anyhow, the Latin name for the creature answered a certain question that has been nagging me for decades. Why is that owl in Clash of the Titans called Bubo? Yes, I watched the credits to make sure that “not my precious Bubo’ is spelled ‘bubo.’ Ya know, in espanol it’s called a ‘buho.’ That’s a better name, because that’s what owls say (bwuo!). Bwuo! Bwuo! Say it squatting on a branch with your arms like chicken wings. You’ll see that it’s a superior name.

I learn something new every day. Pretty soon I'll be knowledgeable about something.

This is what Bubo has been up to since his starring role:

Here are other animals with issues:

Pretty sure the porcupines had been roofied.
Eagle told me to tell you this message, "I'm not bald, you morons. I have white feathers. Also, I'm tired of this owl next to us. It's like he doesn't even SEE ME. Total jerk of a neighbor."