My darling Ivy, my friend in the cave

face-in-a-cave
Ivy

My darling Ivy, my friend in the cave. Don’t know when she got there. Don’t know why she would stay. The glint of her eye says she might once roamed free. But, she has no voice and could never tell me.

_______________________

Sometimes I see very cute faces in things, like last week when I was behind a Jeep without its spare tire. He had a really goofy smile.

But every now and then I see a freaky Cave Demon. GAH! Burn it with fire!

For your reading pleasure, see Jiangang Liu’s IgNoble Prize  for researching what happens to the brain when you see Jesus on a piece of toast.

Mannequins of the USS Lexington

Soulless automaton. Hmm. Appears to be similar to some of my coworkers.
Soulless automaton. Hmm. Appears to be similar to some of my coworkers.

I do not like mannequins with faces or other human features. Let me explain: I got upset this morning when drinking my McDonald’s coffee because I didn’t like the “face” the plastic lid made when I opened the drink hole. You can imagine the shock to the system that an angry mannequin would be when you are deep in the bowels of a silent, decommissioned battleship.

Looks traumatized by his receptionist job.
Looks traumatized by his receptionist job. For God’s sake: DO NOT SMOKE. He will kill you!

I left out the horrors of the dental examination rooms for your safety. I don’t want you to have any nightmares! My seven-year-old declared the dental exhibit inappropriate. Yes. Somehow it’s creepy as hell to have motion-detectors on your sound system. A sound system blaring out a buzzing drill with a man screaming.

Oh, I don’t want to warn you about that section. It’s best experienced in person.

Overly happy. Do not trust.
Overly happy. Do not trust.
That is, um, a look on your face.
That is, um, a look on your face.

Okay, so the purpose of this project was to use the fisheye lens I rented to enhance the creepy factor of these creepazoids. I just knew there would be something horrid to distort on this old ship. Yay! Museum folks never understand what neurotic people might make of their work.

Or do they???

Creepy Carousel Critter

I'm judging you. YEP. you.
I’m judging you. YEP. you.

I was at the Minnesota Zoo with my kids, who were both entranced by the opportunity to ride tragic fiberglass animals. I’ve always been really creeped out by carousels, but the kiddos wanted a ride.

I was relieved to see that there weren’t a bunch of “Terror Horses” that you usually see on carousels. You know the kind….

Everything was fine until I spotted this judgmental koala. It looks so disappointed in your life choices. SO DISAPPOINTED.