Little Pawn Shop of Horrors

Holy frick. This place is more Mutter Museum than pawn shop. Imagine, there I am, enjoying the shopping deals on El Paso Street a couple blocks from the border.  ($6 stripper shoes? Count me in!) Then, I pass by a mummy in a glass case that’s going for $14,995. The first few trips, I resisted the urge to go in to this establishment. [A case styled as: must…see…dead body…in glass case v. must get back to Austin alive] Dead body prevailed.

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I took these babies on my camera phone. I totally got caught, and some beeatch tried to shoulder check me at the exit in a sad little attempt to prevent my escape. No damn way I was going to end up as a skull for sale in that little hell-hole.

Since I have a bad habit of pawning gifts (such as wedding rings) when I get mad, I’ve had the delicious opportunity to visit many pawn shops. I will inform you that this was my first time seeing a skull collection, full human skeleton, mummy, creepy-serial-killer-mask (what the hell is that?!!), plastic dolly, and bull whip AISLE.  Yes, but let’s not forget that great accordion. The reek of death lingers but lightly on it.

I haven’t mustered up the courage to ask them what exactly is ‘shown by appointment.’ The dried pinky finger collection from those who did not pay up on pay-day loans? [I have stared at the door pic so long that I noticed this sign in the upper left corner of the door.]

People keep saying what a waste of time facebook is. Well, when I posted these puppies, I got spectacular advice such as:

Ann, it’s not safe after dark in downtown! 

You should be careful! Yes, I am scolding you. Now, back to your hotel room, missy!

I should have listened. Here’s why: A couple drunk guys contemplated (loudly) kidnapping/raping me. Not kidding. They decided that because there were people filming in the hotel across the desolate street from me, it wasn’t worth the risk. Yikes.

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